I like IPAs and I’m secure enough to not be bothered by the mockery my basic brothers and I face online.
This thing got really popular for some reason. It must be awful!
My perspective is that the “basic” people can’t wait to bring up how much they despise IPAs and without a single exception the reason is always “they’re just SO hoppy!!!”
I heard a real-world explanation about why IPAs are the most common and commonly-sought craft beer. Half the reasons are unflattering, but a few are valid.
- They’re harder to fuck up because the Hops covers every damn thing and is so forgiving. Ever heard a cooking show talk about how hard a perfect Filet Mignon is because you can’t hide behind anything and everyone knows what it should taste like? Ditto with a good red ale or even pilsner.
- Similarly, nobody is known for their signature Filet Mignon because (within reason) a filet is a filet. Ditto with most types of beers. IPAs give opportunity for a lot more variety. Which is why you have more breweries making them, and then more people consuming them. I go out of my way to find non-MGP whiskey because MGP whiskies all taste the damn same to me, and I usually find a couple unique bottles every year. I can respect someone who wants to try a totally new beer every week and just fall back on a few faves.
- Related again to #2. Beyond being “SO hoppy”, IPAs have more unique flavor profiles than all other beers combined. Different hops can net you notes of orange, lemon, grapefruit, or notes of the pith of one of those, or notes of the rind of one of those. Different amounts or processing of hops can give you different intensities of those. That’s a lot of flavor profiles from sweet to sour to bitter, all in the same category.
So I’m “basic” nowadays re: beer, and I despise IPAs because I literally cannot stand the bitter&pithy ones (esp Grapefruit Pith), and there’s no easy way to know what an IPA will taste like till you’ve paid for it and cracked it open. I also get reflux and nothing blows that shit out of the water like an IPA. There’s a hops shop down the street from me, but if I’m going to brew a beer (super rare, I usually make whiskey or mead) it’s gonna be something will a chill flavor profile.
there’s no way to know what an IPA will taste like before you crack it open
That’s why I like brewers that publish their hops. I’m the opposite of you, I live for the citrusy, fruity type of hops and despise the more traditional floral/piney strains. If I see simcoe on the bill I’ll go to bed sober, but if you’ve got Willamette or Cascade I’ll make tea from them.
What if my enjoyement is making fun of basic white dudes drinking IPA’s?
Vegans, PSL girls, IPA guys, furries, and anime nerds seem to be the most popular targets for boring, basic memes.
Everyone who doesn’t get it needs to read this.
It can be quickly summarized to the line in the article, “marketers have an insatiable appetite for turning human enjoyment into target-based profit”. Couple that with the fact that females tend to receive more ridicule for their consumption habits, and you’ve got this article.
Hasn’t aged a day
Those dudes are so basic the pic looks ai-generated.
IP-AI?
you seem racist
Ah, projecting our own thoughts onto others I see.
It’s the middle of Oktoberfest season, and you went with IPAs for this meme?
Not to mention, there’s literally pumpkin spice beer.
Oktoberfest beers (Märzens) literally have carmel malts, they’re the Starbucks of beers.
Food has a cultural component tied to its manufacture and identification. And IPAs are food that probably shouldn’t exist and which only does as a byproduct of market capitalism. They’re the Lacanian ‘object a’ - an empty, manufactured falseness. We don’t desire the thing itself, but the thing whose absence it symbolizes. What you’re really consuming when you drink an IPA is its innate mechanical predictability.
(Thanks to the thread last week arguing about pumpkin spice lattes for giving me a new copypasta to use about anything I personally dislike.)
ChatGPT, write me something edgy involving transcendentalism and IPA
My new fave
I am a basic ass white dude and this is accurate.
as the small brewery industry developed I went from “fuck IPAs” to “hit me in the face with another pinecone please” and I’m not sorry
Oh man I love that piney taste
Second this.
I like drinking IPAs.
Fight me?
drinking anything other than vodka
How can you call yourself a true communist?
For real. All other liquors are bourgeoise decadence.
All you need is the smoothly burning taste of Slavic tap water to have a good time.
Exactly. You want hard ciders? Just get some fruit juice and pour vodka in it.
You want wine? Get some grape juice and pour vodka in it.
You want beer? Just dissolve some stale bread in vodka. It has less sugar. Healthier for you.
Need paint thinner? Medical antiseptic? Flammable Molly material?
Just spritz some slav tap water on it and you’ll have good time
IPAs aren’t really seasonal? I always associate fall with Marzen style lagers for Oktoberfest, and big winter warmers like barleywine and sweet stouts.
I have no idea what any of those words mean
Yeah, but I don’t drink 16 pumpkin spice lattes in one sitting.
You ok, friend?
No, but ask me again after 16 Ninkasi Prismatics and the answer might change.
A white dude who drank IPAs told me that
synthesis: pumpkin ale
Death to America
I have good news comrade
I’m German too, while I usually prefer southern german beer with a strong wheat, malt and yeast flavour I also occasionally like to explore other flavours like IPA or more exotic ones from different countries. I mean, drink what you like or don’t drink at all (which might be better, health-wise). Gates open, come on in.
If you like IPAs, that’s fine. If you’re buying someone, like me, a beer at karaoke, trust me when I say that I want the cheap Modelo or Milwaukee’s Best on tap. Don’t buy me an IPA that costs twice as much, but I won’t drink it cause it tastes bad.
Oh, ew! Why would it cost more than a dollar more than Pabst? You’re not in the Northwest are you? I assure you there are fantastic ones that are palatable to any palate and don’t cost a fortune
Imperial Beach, so south west. I’ve tried so many IPAs. They’re all way too hoppy. I’m simple. Gimme a Budweiser or similar.
Oh, you can still be simple and find an IPA that has such a pleasing and effervescent flavor that it drives you to make bad life decisions.
I feel you on the hoppy part, though. Not every IPA needs to be dry-hopped (the process of running the fermented beer through hops again to impart flavor).
